Comments on: Kinky Reality http://kinkinexile.wordpress.com/2007/08/03/kinky-reality/ Notes from a kinky nomad Wed, 07 Oct 2009 10:04:42 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: devastatingyet http://kinkinexile.wordpress.com/2007/08/03/kinky-reality/#comment-45 devastatingyet Sun, 19 Aug 2007 02:48:50 +0000 http://kinkinexile.wordpress.com/2007/08/03/kinky-reality/#comment-45 My Joscelin would like for me to put in a more constrained box with protocols. We currently have three, to wit: (1) When he hands me stuff, he has to do it one knee. If we're in public or around non-bdsm friends, he has to put one foot behind the other to do it instead, as subtly as possible. (2) When we're alone together, and he is sitting, his legs must be parted. (3) He can't open the car door to get out before I do. He would like me to hold him to a lot of standards and punish him frequently and non-shamingly for his non-adherence, if any. I think that is a sexy thought too, but the truth is, the "box" I have for him is gigantic and he just doesn't transgress. I love him to be like himself all the time. I call him my "slave" for <a href="http://devastatingyet.wordpress.com/2007/08/18/slave/" rel="nofollow">reasons I described here</a>. But he's not my "real" slave even in a bdsm way, and certainly not in a real life way. My Joscelin would like for me to put in a more constrained box with protocols. We currently have three, to wit:

(1) When he hands me stuff, he has to do it one knee. If we’re in public or around non-bdsm friends, he has to put one foot behind the other to do it instead, as subtly as possible.
(2) When we’re alone together, and he is sitting, his legs must be parted.
(3) He can’t open the car door to get out before I do.

He would like me to hold him to a lot of standards and punish him frequently and non-shamingly for his non-adherence, if any. I think that is a sexy thought too, but the truth is, the “box” I have for him is gigantic and he just doesn’t transgress. I love him to be like himself all the time.

I call him my “slave” for reasons I described here. But he’s not my “real” slave even in a bdsm way, and certainly not in a real life way.

]]> By: This Girl http://kinkinexile.wordpress.com/2007/08/03/kinky-reality/#comment-31 This Girl Fri, 03 Aug 2007 18:17:09 +0000 http://kinkinexile.wordpress.com/2007/08/03/kinky-reality/#comment-31 I agree here really with what you have said. For me BDSM is a sexual fantasy, but one that when i am engaging in it does feel very 'real' and yes i do feel as though i am his 'slave' in the way he & I define it within that fantasy. I dont believe in protocals or excessive rules, i try and aim to be a good submissive for him (and he a good Dom for me) and that i think is the main point of it all you know. That and it should be fun. I dont think its healthy to allow your fantasies to overake your real-life i think you need to still do other things as well, work, have a family, socialise etc. I think women (and i suppose men) who sink into the fantasy of having their lives totally micro-managed totally lose grip of what is actually reality! xx I agree here really with what you have said. For me BDSM is a sexual fantasy, but one that when i am engaging in it does feel very ‘real’ and yes i do feel as though i am his ’slave’ in the way he & I define it within that fantasy. I dont believe in protocals or excessive rules, i try and aim to be a good submissive for him (and he a good Dom for me) and that i think is the main point of it all you know. That and it should be fun. I dont think its healthy to allow your fantasies to overake your real-life i think you need to still do other things as well, work, have a family, socialise etc. I think women (and i suppose men) who sink into the fantasy of having their lives totally micro-managed totally lose grip of what is actually reality!

xx

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