Kink in exile

Notes from a kinky nomad

Sing it sister!

Just as I was winding down from talking May’s ear off about my domming angst I come across this post by Bitchy Jones.

I am so glad there is someone else out there who stands around putting foul things in her mouth to see if it is doable. And maybe I am not the only woman out there whose response to burning herself with a too hot candle is “oh, I’m glad I tried that first.” It’s outrageous that I actually waste time wondering if I am not bitchy, demanding, and heartless enough to be a good domme. I panic about not being able to cause enough pain and then the next day look at my handiwork and panic about the fact that I seem to qualify for a job with the Chinese riot police.

I find it frustrating that tops aren’t supposed to ever be flustered or unsure. Of course “oops” is the last think you want to hear when you’re tied up, but for the love of god do you think I was born knowing how to throw a single tail?


Written by kinkinexile

April 1, 2008 at 2:03 pm

2 Responses

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  1. Yeah, I feel you. Especially, actually, doing it professionally. People expect that you’re ready for everything, and are surprised/disappointed/annoyed when they didn’t ask for specifically what they wanted and then I say “no, actually, I don’t know how to safely use sounds and I’m not going to practice on you”.


    April 4, 2008 at 10:03 pm

  2. I agree. I am lucky enough to have a partner to which I can say, “I don’t know how to do that…” as well as he can say that me. Part of the fun is exploring together. Your post is an excellent example of one of the reasons I won’t play with people who I don’t know because without knowing them the play lacks understanding of experience, on both sides.

    BBW Switch

    April 21, 2008 at 6:37 pm

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