Kink in exile

Notes from a kinky nomad

Race Play

I recently read a post on Best Sex Bloggers about race play. Race retaliations are pretty controversial in America and I still have a hard time fully understanding that, but if some other popular fetishes serve as an indicator the controversy only makes it hotter. The Best Sex Blogger post quotes both a black man who enjoys race play and a black woman who is against it. Perhaps because of how both people handle their position on the matter I can agree with both. To say that the word nigger carries social baggage is putting it mildly. Think of your reaction to reading that word, and then consider the amplification of having it spoken, and then of having it spoken in an already power-ladened context. This is both sexy and disconcerting, but then what tools of BDSM aren’t?

I can relate to this, somewhat, through Nazi play. While I try not to begrudge other people their fun, Nazi play elicits an irrational level of anger for me. I can name 16 members of my family who died in concentration camps, and this is not sexy. Taking a step back, however, I can understand how the shared memory or oppression and fear, uniforms and ready-made roles, not to mention hot German men makes for good play. I was at a party a couple of months back where a young woman was held at gunpoint by a man in a SS uniform. This made me uncomfortable because I thought she was co-opting my cultural narrative to serve her own ends…until she turned around and I saw that in place of a yellow star she had a black triangle, and that made all the difference. It was no longer about my history and my people. Instead the story was about her as a lesbian, or a prostitute — it was about her own history of oppression, which she has decided to turn on its head and get off on. Not something I would do, but more power to those who would.

Written by kinkinexile

March 31, 2009 at 11:48 am

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